(updated 28 Mar 07)


The time has come for us to put this baby to rest for a while...yes, there's a reason we call it the "Rotating Contest" and we are rotating another one in its place after this installment. What we need from you is your vote and/or suggestion which contest to pop in its place. You can peruse the archive to see which one you'd like to see next...or send an idea of your own...maybe we'll use it - and if you do, you'll win something "nifty" that you'd be ashamed to own...or at the very least, something to give away to someone.

Just send your vote/suggestion in as you normally would submit an entry here.


Drek provided by Cad and Bucko

The term for digging around in a bodily orifice and then trying to play it off like no one (including you) saw it.
(DeFUNition sent in by rulaffin@gmail.com)

Orifishing (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

Pickorifacetiousness (luganrn77@yahoo.com)

Actually, if you're a scandal-prone Republican, you're just looking for some place to hide. (humorbear@aol.com) All they gotta do is follow their heads...

Subtlebuttleing (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

The Seinfeld (guitartexn@aol.com) That was an angle you barely scratched the surface of. ;)

Finger-Jamnesia (stan@squidworks.com)

Boogerefute (rsherman@netplexgroup.com) In New Jersey, AKA "Isnotsnot". Um...I grew up in Jersey...if anyone NOSE what we said there...it's me...and if anyone said it there, it would undoubtedly be preceded by "Yo".

Itchcraft (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

Pickenflickenhidit (MindgameFiziks@hotmail.com) Yeah, about my windshield, Smedley....

Assimime (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

I scratch my ass so much, I don't know I am doing it. The hell with anyone else. Try it, you might like it. (NITRAMXXX@aol.com) I am NOT scratching your ass, I don't care how cute you are!

Digstraction (strontium901@juno.com)

Picknoramus (atwright73@yahoo.com) Contrary to what you might think...this is not a term for us judges when we don't choose your entry. Speaking of judges...that brings us to Mike Judge and "Heh heh heh...she said 'entry', Butthead." Yes...I still miss those guys.

Ignoranus (Pootybrew@goosemoose.com)

Eargasm (skibip@aol.com) Having aural sex in public is NOT subtle!

Pseudofingulation (Banks.del@gmail.com)

Vagimagination (GrigsbyOK@hotmail.com) "Lucy...you got some s'plainin' to do!" No wait...that's "Vitameatavegamin". Carry on.

Asspickindenialitis (ronxian@aol.com)

Womb-atism (e-marlon@sio.midco.net) Don't tell me nobody noticed you reaching in THERE!

Inavelidate (DaphnetheRed@yahoo.com)

Autobliviass (kempter815@cs.com)

Nostrilgamus (GrigsbyOK@hotmail.com) In quatrain 976, he knew what you'd be up to....CAD!

Asspionage (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

Misdirectal (williemelmoth@aol.com) Isn't that what David Copperfield and David Blaine are famous for? Ooops, sorry...that's misdirection done BY assholes.

Jamouflaging (Airfarcewon@aol.com) Speaking of Airfarce:

Orifarce (changetion@gmail.com) COINCIDENCE??

Alzholers (GerriHan65@aol.com) Or you could just "pick" this one if you prefer...

Alzheinies (GerriHan65@aol.com)

The winners:

And nobody noticed the entire COMMITTEE doing all this??...

Amnesiacandidialcurettage (luganrn77@yahoo.com)

Not to be confused with the aforementioned "ignoranus"...as that's a 'hole' different thing...

Dignorance (GerriHan65@aol.com)