(updated 1 Jun 04)
I'll get the "No No's" title up here eventually...so for the time being you'll have to pretend it's there.
Things Not To Say and/or Do At An Orgy
(Topic suggested by firstname.lastname@example.org)
Invite your local chapter of Abstinence Anonymous. (email@example.com)
Reveal you're a moil. (Cmndrnineveh@aol.com)
For God's sake, don't lose a contact lens. (firstname.lastname@example.org; Pmacca01@go.com)
Point and laugh. (DOrr@jam.rr.com)
"Soooooo....you come here often?" (email@example.com; Mistahtom@aol.com)
"Just go ahead and start by yourself until everyone else shows up." (Cantw82paint@Aol.com) Actually, I believe this may be a requirement.
"Aw go ahead, pull my finger!" (firstname.lastname@example.org; email@example.com)
"Don't worry, it's only computers that are getting viruses these days." (firstname.lastname@example.org)
"Reverend Johnson? Is that you?" (email@example.com)
"I've got a headache." (ROBERTELLINGSWORTH@YAHOO.COM; firstname.lastname@example.org)
"Whohoo...hey, Mom when's Grandpa coming?" (Elemskt91@aol.com) I would say something, but I don't want to deal with the dry heaves it would bring on.
Don't be the first one to "arrive". This is one part that it's O.K. to be fashionably "late". (email@example.com)
"Excuse me, is this seat taken?" (firstname.lastname@example.org)
"Now, WHERE did I stick that remote?" (email@example.com)
"Anyone for a game of charades?" (firstname.lastname@example.org) "Geez...not, 'North By Northwest' again!!" (Ironically, I hadn't a clue this film was on TMC tonite...so it was a really bizarre coincidence...that no one but me would even remotely care about...carry on.)
"Woo hoo! Child support's on me!" (email@example.com)
"Bottom's up!" (RasGold@cox.net)
Refer to it as an, "All-You-Can-Eat Buttfet?" (firstname.lastname@example.org)
"Hi, I sell Amway." (email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org)
"Here I am! Nearly rash-free and ready to party!" (email@example.com)
Never say, "May I cut in" in the S&M room. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
"This takes me back to my good ole' days on the farm!" (email@example.com)
"Oops, sorry about that bro, thought you were a chick!" (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Never yell "Hey it's the fuzz". And definitely do not complain about the fuzz. (email@example.com) Which ties in all too well with this one...
"Oh, gross! There's a cat hair in my mouth, at least I think it's a cat hair....." (LillyotValley2@aol.com)
"Hey Boss! Fancy seeing you here. Nice leather collar." (firstname.lastname@example.org)
"I love these things.. nobody knows WHO had crabs!" (ChrisAndBrandi69@aol.com)
Kinda brings the out the HO in those "Home" videos, huh?...
"Hey, does anyone mind if I videotape for America's Funniest Videos?" (email@example.com)