(updated 22 Apr 04)

Please remember to also cast your vote at the Tweak Of The Week entry box link for "No No's" or "Grave Words"...which will then run approximately three months in Finish Line's contest slot.

You know life is passing you by if...

...who cares, let's just take a nap. (mrxsandmanx@yahoo.com)

...when you mention the word "melody" to youngsters these days, they ask "What's THAT...?!" (cmndrnineveh@aol.com)

...your six-year-old son can operate those new ATM-style voting booths -- but you can't. (junkmailmagnet42@aol.com) Ahhhh...so THIS is how it all happened.

...the labels on the tablets You keep inside your medicine cabinet read Celexa, Prozac, Citalopram Hydrobromide... (DOrr@jam.rr.com)

...this contest is just too painful to enter. (HerzogVon@aol.com)

...you realize that kids who are learning to drive right now were born right around the start of The Simpsons. (scalpel@aol.com)

...the highlight of your day consists of observing the day to day dramas of your cats. (ChrisAndBrandi69@aol.com) So why should this day be any different from the last 4,291?

...you realize that ranch houses cost as much as mansions and cars now cost as much as houses USED to...insurance FOR cars costs as much as NEW cars used to, shoes now cost as much as entire SUITS used to and nothing is sold for single digit prices anymore. The 2 cent post card...?? HAR DE HAR HAR! (cmndrnineveh@aol.com)

...you consider staying up to watch the ten o'clock news as pulling an all-niter. (robertellingsworth@yahoo.com)

...you always look back at the days when your pants were loose and your wife was tight...instead of the other way around!! (steve_medel@oxy.com)

...men start looking you in the eye. (william.fishburne@verizon.net) Hey...I've got boobies still, dammit!

...it seems like it was only yesterday we had the last 17-Year Cicada Swarm. (chharget@aol.com)

...the only friends you have are in your favorite chat room! (iholdridge@aol.com)

...allright, Finish Line has been updated! I get to submit a new entry! (mrxsandmanx@yahoo.com)

...you know more about the lives of reality show contestants than about your spouse's. (arch_deceiver@hotmail.com)

Oh, don't take it personally...it's just his mission...

...an Amish guy tells you to get with the times. (zenphoenix@yahoo.com)