(updated 12 Feb 05) 

...but liquor is quicker.
(Suggested by ParisIuvsMe@aol.com)

Chardonnay may make her sway...but liquor is quicker. (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

Hitting yourself in the head repeatedly with a ball pene hammer is one way to get yourself unconscious...but liquor is quicker. (cdmauger@aol.com)

Pot makes me snicker...but liquor is quicker. (tpanner@hotmail.com) And you spend less on munchies as you usually just pass out.

You can try to convince yourself that your date is good looking...but liquor is quicker. (Cantw82paint@Aol.com)

Charming a woman with hours of intellectual conversation might get her in your bed...but liquor is quicker. (DLivermore2002@yahoo.com) You play HMO...c'mon how much "intellectual" conversation could you manage?

It's making me sicker...but liquor is quicker. (tpanner@hotmail.com)

Old age can bring erectile dysfunction...but liquor is quicker. (sheafitz1@netscape.com) And erectile dysfunction is in...well, uh not really...but you know what I mean.

Praise will amaze...but liquor is quicker. (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

NyQuil might help at night...but liquor is quicker. (hunkafunk@hotmail.com)

A cop tried to catch me driving drunk...but liquor is quicker. (dennisilvr@aol.com)

What satisfies a woman faster: intercourse or oral sex? A recent poll shows that intercourse is fine... ..but liquor is quicker. (ukkfayooyay@aol.com)

Listening to a Bush speech is mind-numbing...but liquor is quicker. (strontium901@juno.com)

Hey, it would have to be one of those really big "mall cookies", tho...

A chocolate chip cookie might lead to nookie...but liquor is quicker. (Airfarcewon@aol.com)