Crossing The Finnish Line
(Title Inspired by Airfarcewon@aol.com)
Sonkajaervi, Finland -- With his friend, Inga Klauso, riding upside-down on his back, Madis Uusorg crossed the finishing line here after just one minute and 5.3 seconds, securing an Estonian gold in the 2004 Wife-Carrying World Championships.
In related news G.W.Bush banned same-sex marriages from competing in the same event held in the States. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Why wasn't this live on Fox Sports World? (HerzogVon@aol.com)
In a related story, Mrs. Uusorg came in a close second but was carrying only a rolling pin. (email@example.com)
Aren't all lines in Finland 'finish' lines? (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Ingo curtly refused interviews after the race; apparantly frustrated because while her partner had 'finished', she wanted to 'race' some more. (email@example.com)
Most commentators assumed that giving your wife an "Estonian gold" during the race would result in immediate disqualification. (firstname.lastname@example.org) and I'll bet you thought an "Estonian gold" was come kinda medal, did'n'cha? (email@example.com) Actually I thought Estonian gold was a European knockoff of Colombian marching powder.
Way to go, Madis! I can't even pronounce the name of that city in 1 minute, 5.3 seconds. (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)
She is still upset about the spike and touchdown dance. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Does this mean they are married now? (email@example.com)
And our own winner, who most definately won't be getting any "estonian gold", filthy filthy filthy...
The Silver Medalist, David Quilling of the USA, was disqualified when it was discovered that his marriage to "wife" Doug Allen had been nullified by the City of Boston, since they were not residents of that city at the time of their marriage. Quilling plans to appeal the decision. His silver medal was awarded instead to third-place contestant Jim Dell, a Mormon from Utah who carried three of his four wives around the track in 1 minute and 18 seconds. (firstname.lastname@example.org)