"Never Mind the Bullocks"
(Title Inspired by KatSut78@aol.com)
(13 July 2004) LONDON (Reuters) -- A British man who accidentally shot himself in the testicles after drinking 15 pints of beer was jailed for five years on Tuesday for possessing an illegal firearm, a court spokesman said.
(Topic suggested by firstname.lastname@example.org)
So, I guess if he'd have shot himself in the balls and had a permit..no problem, huh? (Airfarcewon@aol.com; email@example.com) Nah. Either way use of his weapon would be revoked.
I get really annoyed everytime I do this. (HerzogVon@aol.com) "You know you're going to have a bad day when..."
The court offered to suspend his sentence if he would shoot off the OTHER testicle, thereby guaranteeing no heirs to pass on his genes... (firstname.lastname@example.org) Could be worse, could've sentenced him to the firing squad.
He actually was grateful, since he realized that's the only way he's gonna see any action in the near future. (email@example.com)
The beer was no problem...it was that shot he took, afterwards! (Airfarcewon@aol.com)
Isn't shooting yourself in the testicles punishment enough? (firstname.lastname@example.org; YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)
The court rejected a temporary insanity defense stating that "losing your marbles," is a figure of speech, not to be taken literally. (Truckerex@insightbb.com)
The British man pleaded with the judge stating, "I need to be jailed like I need another hole in my testicles." (email@example.com)
And the runner-up, just for the sheer groanliness, is...
Must have been using ball shot... (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Which leaves only...
On top of all these problems, his wife sued for divorce...and there was an AMA litigation for performing a vasectomy without a license. (Airfarcewon@aol.com) ...as our winner