(updated 5 Apr 03)

Hosted by Jankath


POLAND -- Scientists have announced that for a couple to have a higher social status, earn more money, and have the right size children, the man should be 1.09 times taller than the woman.

Lying down, that is. (rockitower@aol.com)

WHAT!! Oh . . . whew . . . for a minute there I thought it said "...the man should be 1.09 times taller than the WOMB. (seeker@vcoms.net)

OK...this proves it, size does matter. (Ttifranks9@aol.com) (And everybody else.)

Adding soon after, "The woman should also have a really great rack." (WillyTheTunaFish@aol.com)

I don't know if it's a good thing to know that scientists in other countries can waste money as easily as American scientists can. (tygrkhat40@yahoo.com)

That takes care of height...but what about width? (Baitsmotel6@aol.com)

So is that why Sonny and Cher divorced? (motorbreath2000@netscape.net)

I didn't even know they could spell science in Poland, let alone have scientists. (iamzachmo@msn.com)

...Of course they don't, silly. They spell UMIEJETNOSC.

They did not say anything about the brains..so I guess that part is STILL left up to the woman. (Ttifranks9@aol.com)

How many Polish scientists did it take to figure that out? (RonnieRayReese@hotmail.com)

What's this obsession with measuring Poles? (TerriKlein@aol.com)

...Prompting Cosmopolitan Magazine to run a front page article on "corrective foot slicing" inside their annual "Love Yourself The Way You Are" issue. (Kodachroam@aol.com)

So, the only way for Liz Hurley to have good children is to marry Godzilla? (kaylor@mail.com)

The men also have to have a 1.09 smaller breast size than the women. (RasGold@aol.com)

Yeah, but what if you are gay? (Mistahtom@aol.com)

...Then I guess you have to be really carefully at the sperm bank. Either way.

Being of Polish heritage, try as he might, Jankath just couldn't stand on a chair 1.09 times. (MooseSpeak@earthlink.net)

...SHE, smartass. Speaking of which:

See? I told you the metric system's just a pain in the ass! (seeker@vcoms.net)

And to think that today's winner, TerriKlein@aol.com, has wasted all that time checking out shoe sizes:

The scientists acknowledge that a boatload of cash works too, and are currently down in Gdansk, measuring boats. (TerriKlein@aol.com)