(updated 15 Jul 08)


Drek provided by Cad and Bucko

Political Mudslinging
A
nd to make it even more interesting, we want one of the rhyming lines to end with the word "lie" (or a version of it, i.e., lies, lying, liar, etc.).

In November our minds will be waning
From JMac and B.O. campaigning
It's no wonder we eye
(in the twinkle of a lie)
A vote for Pat Paulsen? hmm, entertaining. (guitartexn@aol.com)
Ah, if only the Smothers Brothers were running.... Tom would have to be VP because Mom always liked Dick best.

Yeah, you heard me.

A political party was tryin'
To have their mascot be a lion
Campaigns were set back
When the mascot attacked
And ate everyone up, I ain't lyin'! (retrometro@rogers.com)


Red state, Blue state, liar, liar.
Mason-Dixon, pants on fire.
Look to the West and look to the East
And vote for the one you hate the least.
Can't wait 'til we're out of this muck and mire. (luganrn77@yahoo.com)


Vote for me, and you'll get blah blah blah
My opponent's full of ka ka ka.
I'll promise the skies
You'll believe all my lies
The joke is on you, hah hah hah. (skibip@aol.com)


"Hill" tossed Reverend Wright in the 'fiah'
Showed sermons of wild Jeremiah
Obama fought back,
No bullets attack,
While in Bosnia...she was a liah! (Airfarcewon@aol.com)


Many a politician lies
Plotting another's demise
His words of disdain
Loud, rude and profane
Prove often one gets what one buys. (reidayork@aol.com)


As Barack's aspirations get higher
his choice of VP becomes dire
He knows he'd get pilloried
if he picked up Hillary
Because with her comes Bill, the Liar. (skibip@aol.com)
But that WOULD bring out the women's vote, since women generally like a "slick willy".

Ellen DeGeneres, please sit down.

I'm sick and tired of lies.
It's hypocrites that I despise.
They'll work and they'll toil
To sell you snake oil
When the White House is their real prize. (tpanner@hotmail.com)


The neighbours at house 1602
On Pennsylvania Avenue
Have spread so many lies
And gossip otherwise
You wouldn't believe what they'd tell you (retrometro@rogers.com)


Why, he's so old he's practically dying!
McCain's detractors continue implying
But he's never been a whinah
Even when shot down in Indochina
Hold the obit, he'll prove they're lying. (gerg17@comcast.net)


The man in the White House each day
Goes totally berserk when they say
He's up to his eyes
In nothing but lies
And they're coming to take him away! (retrometro@rogers.com)
"Ho ho...hee hee...ha ha..." - okay so I'm old...but still not as old as McCain...then again nearly NO one is.


From now, till the "Big Tuesday" sets in
Las Vegas, will be taking big bets in
But each candidate's half lying,
And the other half, denying..
So, what does it matter who gets in? (Airfarcewon@aol.com)


There once was a man named Barack
And all that he said was a crock
With allies he'd lie
Then go out for pie
With friends from Iran and Iraq. (ponytayl@cox.net)


Politicians are quite hard to tell apart
When the campaign dirt digging must start
Tell the menacing lies
To win that seat prize
If you want to hear an asshole just fart. (arlenekader@aol.com)


If I want to hear that, I'll just turn on FOX News.
Larry Craig said unzipping his fly
Was for pooping not for sex, that's a lie!
He was tapping his toe
He didn't want a quick blow
He was just humming "Judy In Disguise" (arlenekader@aol.com)
Judy Garland, that is. Dead giveaway.


Joe Liebermann just won't be the guy
For President, he said he won't try,
He knows how the press would fizz him
For ethics & plagiarism,
So it's best to let that sleeping dog lie. (ldolphin34@hotmail.com)


'Tis election year and over the waves and the wires
One hears nothing but slander from liars.
Candidates banter and bicker
Then fill up on liquor
To spawn the next day's verbal fires. (luganrn77@yahoo.com)


Obama's Pres platform is strange
He insists that it's time for change
While he repeats this with fire
And none dare call him a liar,
Eight years of W. Bush is max range. (ldolphin34@hotmail.com)


The race for the Prez is a drama
And the favorite, we hear, is Obama
Most polls place him higher
So, Is he the best liar,
Or does John hype too much Viet Nam-a? (Airfarcewon@aol.com)


While campaigning, we'll take the high road,
At least that's what we voters are told.
But candidates vying
Always end up lying
This election is getting too old. (skibip@aol.com)

Speaking of old:

A Prez candidate must be wise
Alert, sharp of mind, IQ highs
So, is McCain able,
With his age on the table
To create and remember good lies? (Airfarcewon@aol.com)


In Washington, they are all liars
Their pants ought to all be on fire
In this, an election
Without an exception
Professional bullshitters they hire. (DaphnetheRed@yahoo.com)

Like:

McClellan is on the stump trying
To make a quick buck by decrying
The dishonest White House
But Scott Mac's still a louse.
Since Day One he was in on the lying. (mahoneycjm@gmail.com)


Why do all that voting booth buying,
When, like Pinocchio, they're both lying
The cheapest way to elect,
Would be to select,
Shortest nose that is on those applying? (Airfarcewon@aol.com)
Yeah...short or not - let's see them keep it out of places it doesn't belong.


Hillary Clinton must be lying!
What kind of lame stunt is she trying?
She battled with Barack
Like we've battled Iraq,
Now a happy twin ticket she's vying. (ldolphin34@hotmail.com)


A black man, a woman, a vet.
Campaigning for my vote to get.
Afraid the Clinton's will lie,
And McCain, he may die,
My choice is Obama? You bet. (lhill@bryant.edu)


Candidates aren't shy, the way they lie
Promising leadership and cheap gas;
But justified fears,
Plus four long years,
You take it up the ass! (humorbear@aol.com)

Winners:

Hey, could be worse - it could be a listing for Fox's "Who Wants to be the Next US President? show...

For the office of Prez they aspire
So their images they all hype higher,
But if you click Wikipedia,
You'll find yes, indeedia,
The word, "Politics" means a liar. (Airfarcewon@aol.com)


Funny, I thought SHE was the "spitzer", but I ain't gonna ask:

His career came to shameful demise
Once he did right between that girls thighs.
Spent the taxpayer's dollar.
To make him scream and hollar.
Too bad Spitzer's squirting nothing but lies. (arlenekader@aol.com)