(updated 19 Oct 07) 

Cops on Heads

The Co-Winners:

"I will NOT be called flatfoot again!" (robertellingsworth@yahoo.com)

Police weren't sure who had stolen the drugs from the evidence locker, but they had a couple of leads. (Truckerex@insightbb.com)

The Runners Up:

George Bush looking over his new homeland security squad. Now don't you feel safer already? (steve_medel@oxy.com)

Vice Versa Squad. (maxcel200@aol.com)

Just what this community needs, more head-strong cops. (esh3404716@aol.com; vinyllover45@yahoo.com)

Of all the jobs in the world police work has the greatest turnover. (maxcel200@aol.com)

A scene from the new NBC fall line up, "Law and Disorder". (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

Come on guys...on your toes! (maxcel200@aol.com)

"No, rookies, that's not what I meant when I said that I'm turning this department upside down." (MindgameFiziks@hotmail.com)

The real problem is keeping these mounted police on their horse! (maxcel200@aol.com)

To save the female passengers the humility of a pat down, Rick and Dean developed a more dignified method of screening for contraband. (leapfrwd@yahoo.com)

"Well fellas, there's a good reason why you keep losing your service revolvers." (tpanner@hotmail.com)

Aussie cops in an exchange program have a tough time adjusting to the northern hemisphere. (gerg17@comcast.net)

I thought to become a policeman you had to be an upright citizen in good standing. (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

"That does it! I'm taking all the Red Bull out of the staff refrigerator!" (vinyllover45@yahoo.com)

The new police strategy to make a criminal pause just long enough to draw on him and blow his brains out. (tpanner@hotmail.com)

"You know, that's the same thing I did to get the people from the southern states to vote for me as President." (saxonraerae7@aol.com)

Due to the high number of bank robberies the police department decided to use under cover officers posing as potted plants. (jaytah@comcast.net)

"I see you've just switched to de-caf." (archerjoe@hotmail.com)

That explains why they dress in all black, only come out at night and wear a protective shield over their hearts. (johnbrunza@yahoo.com)

"Now, say it with me... the taser is not a toy, and it is not to be used on co-workers...now, you think you can remember that from now on?" "Sir, yes sir!" (redbarron1010@aol.com)

Minneapolis airport security practicing to catch the bathroom stall perverts. (Dspur57098@aol.com)

"Well, Chief, we just got picked to be part of a joint task force with China. We're practicing standing the other side up." (kirstenlmsw@gmail.com)

"Yeah...it's mall security... what's so funny?" (johnbrunza@yahoo.com)