(updated 21 Aug 06) 

Goth Wedding

The Quad-Winners:

Sexy as hell. (DLivermore2002@yahoo.com)

Soon after the nuptials, friends and family all did the BitetheheadofftheChicken Dance. (Chick65@aol.com)

The minister was half-way through the funeral rites before anyone corrected him. (jaynashvil@aol.com)

Who would have ever guessed that they met in exorcise class? (vinyllover45@yahoo.com)


The Runners Up:

Bram Stoker's "Dukes of Hazzard" !! (ronxian@aol.com)

I don't see why we can't do research on THEIR stem cells. Do you? (dennisilvr@aol.com)

Wine served at the wedding: Vampire Merlot. (luganrn77@yahoo.com)

I'm okay with same Hex marriages as long as they're not allowed to devour small children. (dennisilvr@aol.com)

I blame a lack of Happy Meals on this one. (j_perreaux@hotmail.com)

"So, who the Devil's getting married, anyway?" (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

"...until death do us part? Come on we are dead already!" (davidgotribe@aol.com)

"We've secretly replaced this couple's groomsmen and bridesmaids with pallbearers. Let's see if they notice." (stan@squidworks.com)

The antennas on their heads were thought to have better "reception". (imwednesdayaddams@gmail.com)

Larry never thought he would need a cross and a lighter to be a wedding photographer. (ronxian@aol.com)

Yet more proof of the old adage that there is someone out there for everyone. (Kamasushi@gmail.com)

This is NOT a marriage made in heaven. (kayladykay@aol.com)

"Take the damn picture, already! Can't you see that the sun is coming up?" (e-marlon@sio.midco.net)

Talk about being horny on your wedding night... (jaberwock@yahooy.com)

It was probably appropriate for the bride to wear white. I believe with all my heart that no one ever screwed that. (Truckerex@insightbb.com)

Something old, something black, something stolen, an ounce of crack. okay, let's do it! (robertellingsworth@yahoo.com)

What a pretty...I mean handsome...I mean...Oh forget it. (MissusMikeyD@aol.com)

She wore white.. how refreshing to see kids respect tradition these days! (CoyPsyche@aol.com)

"Please repeat after me. With this tongue stud I thee wed..." (tpanner@hotmail.com; e-marlon@sio.midco.net)

There wasn't a moist eye in the house. (tpanner@hotmail.com)

And they ban gay marriage for what reason again? (Grad2b2002@aol.com)

The wedding that set a world record for the fastest a father has ever given away the bride. (lexkase@san.rr.com)

"If anyone here DOESN'T have good reason to stop these two from getting married . . " (cdmauger@aol.com)

"You may now drain the bride..." (wonderchild@sbcglobal.net)

Gahh.. Their kids will be so ugly that mom's gonna haveta feed them frozen breastmilk with a slingshot. (thedraugr@yahoo.com)

In honor of their big day, the best man designed his hair to look like St. Patrick's Cathedral!! (scice@aol.com)

Finally, the new" American Goth-ic" (L1061S@go.com)

"....and for those of you who correctly identified the bride as the one on the right, you are entitled to a free, anesthetic-free piercing of your choice." (skibip@aol.com)

Flash forward 20 years from now..."Sorry son/daughter, go back to your room and change into something more presentable." (LarryDaGreat@aol.com)

Kids, don't do drugs...mmmmK! (flynnkj19@aol.com)

Looks like my ex-wife has found someone closer to her normal temperature after all. (e-marlon@sio.midco.net)

Fashion Faux Pas! When marrying Beelzebub, you should ditch the wings. (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)

We've found Jerry's 'puffy shirt' !!!!!!!! (jdcoops3@aol.com) Yeah yeah...I mention Jerry's puffy shirt one time and now everyone does.

Well, there's a twist. He's got her on a leash. (tpanner@hotmail.com)

You're wasting your time. MTV doesn't SHOW music videos anymore. (wedrixe@netscape.net)