(updated 27 Aug 03) 

FedEx vs UPS

The Winner: This ad was brought to you by the US Postal Service! (blunote47@yahoo.com)

The Runners Up:

Must have been an act of G.O.D. (Guaranteed Overnight Delivery) (kamasushi@aol.com)

Another fine example of 'over-tipping' the delivery dudes. (RWich928@aol.com)

Collaborating on new ways to destroy your packages. (Pootybrew@earthlink.net)

When it absolutely, positively has to be there...overturned! (blucas2@centurytel.net; mwatts@nhbakersfield.com)

What did Brown do TO you? (Pastlivesr6@aol.com)

When World(wide carriers) collide. (nafotot@aol.com)

NEWS ITEM: Two leading mailing and package delivery companies have just merged... (Cantw82paint@Aol.com)

"Well, looks like you're absolutely, positively in a mountain of trouble now, Phil." (cdmauger@aol.com)

They went postal. (borkat@aol.com)

Asked why he ran the red-light, the FedEx driver responded, "Wilson told me to do it". Police are working on a sketch of the suspect. (razcactus@netzero.com)

"How's my driving?" (murdoctor@aol.com)

Boy, ever since that Castaway movie came out UPS has been itching for a fight. (Omegamagezero@aol.com)

UPS regretted getting Dale Jarrett to drive the big brown truck. (jnmcda0@yahoo.com)

This is exactly how you "rundown" your competition. (Sugarbaybee69@aol.com)

Both drivers were priority delivered to the hospital. (razcactus@netzero.com)

U.P.S. pronounced "OOPS." (Truckerex@wmconnect.com)