(updated 6 Nov 05) 

Cart Driving

The Co-Winners:

And I get stopped for a blown headlight?? (edprocoat@MSN.COM)

When Amish pimp their rides. (rsherman@netplexgroup.com)

The Runners Up:

Distracted by more sensational events, no one noticed that Exxon was buying up the world's oat supplies. (NonComposMentiss@aol.com)

Shirley hates it when Mom takes her to school. (richdiandkids@optonline.net)

And if you use a mule you can call it a hybrid vehicle. (NonComposMentiss@aol.com)

PLEASE put the cart before the horse... PLEASE! (murdoctor@aol.com)

"The light's green Granny, you can let off the brakes." (dennisilvr@aol.com)

Don't laugh. In five years we'll all be driving them. (NonComposMentiss@aol.com; tpanner@hotmail.com)

Finally the FEMA emergency delivery cart arrives. (richdiandkids@optonline.net)

You might be an Amish Redneck if.... (dennisilvr@aol.com)

The police cited Zelda for her muffler making too much noise..till they realized she didn't have one! (maxcel200@aol.com)

As soon as those kids get across the street, granny is going to "burn rubber". (Rabdreadr@aol.com)

"It's about time this town got a decent mess-transit system!" (monacof@bellsouth.net)

There is just some sh*t you SHOULDN'T inhale! (paracletus3@earthlink.net)

In exchange for the new Medicare prescription benefit, the arrangement for 911 ambulance service has made some downgrades. (luganrn77@yahoo.com)

Having only one horsepower is kind of a drag. (stan@squidworks.com)

Can you really blame this woman for "falling off the wagon" occasionally? (NonComposMentiss@aol.com)

Fully loaded shouldn't mean "with manure". (parlansharvest@yahoo.com)

Bring out your dead! Bring out your dead!! (kintzer@hotmail.com; drmccullers@aol.com)

Taxi rates in some towns are dirt cheap..but there's always a hitch! (maxcel200@aol.com)

Frank's embarrassment was palpable as Mary the Drag Hag pulled away, tyre smokin'.... (rochford@netaus.net.au)

Xtreme Sports are gaining in popularity all across the country, and Lancaster, Pennsylvania is no exception! (manpretty@gmail.com)

I think her tail light is broken! (kyzka2@yahoo.com.au)

"Damn Emmett, Ah'm a'gettin' Tired a' bein' the wheel man..lemme steer awhile!" (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

The cart driver was perplexed at the Spice Girls' attempt to recreate the Beatles' "Abbey Road" album cover in the middle of peak traffic. (ldolphin34@hotmail.com)

'Careful Marge.. If that hippy falls off and you run him over we'll never get the patchouli smell outta the car..' (thedraugr@yahoo.com)

Gas prices reach an all new high...and a man reaches an all new low. (hoosierdaddy0827@aol.com)