Banter provided by Cad and Leis

(Updated 17 Oct 06)

Really Bad Viewer Complaints About the Fall TV Season

When I said last year that it couldn't possibly get any worse, I didn't mean it as a challenge. (GrigsbyOK@hotmail.com)

The battery on my TV remote needs replacing. I spend more time changing stations than watching anything. (tphyll@aol.com)

Not enough commercials. (stan@squidworks.com)

When are they going to bring back Knight Rider? (e-marlon@sio.midco.net)

MTV still won't play a damn video. (ldolphin34@hotmail.com) You want videos...just wait until the YouTube Channel premieres.

Barbara Walters is showing entirely too much skin. (tpanner@hotmail.com)

Not enough Product Placement. (tphyll@aol.com)

People complain that the bright pictures are messing up them looking at the dust on the screen. (gregzeer@yahoo.com) High-def DUST!! Woo-hoooooooo!!!!!!!!!

Caught John Lithgow and Jeffrey Tambor in their new show, "Twenty Good Years"...I'll give'em about "Six Good Weeks"... (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

More crime, less comedy... like the news. (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)

The new shows aren't like Seinfeld. (archerjoe@hotmail.com) Don't even get me started.

Springsteen said it best: 57 channels and there's nothing on. (luganrn77@yahoo.com)

There aren't enough nubile, young actresses embroiled in sexual situations barely veiled as plot lines parading around in their underwear to be considered good American television. (bhsmrtgrrl@yahoo.com) Hey...they still air Three's Company on Nick at Nite.

Stuff just sucks so much louder in high definition. (fparsons@yahoo.com)

When does "Survivor, the Bronx" come out...now THAT one I would watch. (jaberwock@yahooy.com)

My Cheshire cat split his lip trying to outsmile Katie. (maxcel200@aol.com) Even The Joker can't smile like that.

Why they won't give Cad her own reality show, I'll never understand! (Jdoveraz@aol.com)

Still no reality show about the making of a reality show where the contestants all think it is a real reality show and the winner is made the host of a new reality show about the making of a reality show... (mikepena@verizon.net)

I can't wait to catch it... THIS SPRING! (grumpchong@gmail.com; tainsam@aol.com)

How come there's no series about Snakes on a Plane? (Jdoveraz@aol.com)

This is why...

The pilot episode of "Snakes On A Plane: The Reality Show"....After six weeks the show will go off the air and you can ask at any BlockBuster Video for a DVD of deleted scenes from the show....You won't get it, but you can ask. (vinyllover45@yahoo.com)

Not enough Hasselhoff!!! (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com; astae@paonline.com)

They're one reality show short of a full season. Oh sorry that was last week's Reba category!!! (steve_medel@oxy.com)

I'm waiting for the Paris Hilton version of "I Love Lucy." (tphyll@aol.com)

I don't think I'll need that Lunestra after all. (wedrixe@netscape.net)

When Jerry Springer is on Dancing with the Stars, the whole f**king industry has jumped the shark. (GrigsbyOK@hotmail.com)

I think the reruns are more original.. (Airfarcewon@aol.com) Would that be Rerun from "What's Happening?", or the Rerun from "What's Happening Now?" ???

Please no more reality shows. If I wanted reality, I would shut the damned old noisy box off and go get drunk. (lsamarri@aol.com)

Wasn't all this crap canceled last season? (fparsons@yahoo.com)

The winners:

Oh, sure...you might balk at it...but those reality show writers are now thinking..."Ooooh...Survivor: Mypos"...

Oh my God, not ANOTHER season without a Bronson Pinchot sitcom! (Jdoveraz@aol.com)

"Head On: apply directly to--" OMG, just lobotomize me, already...

The shows keep putting me to sleep, but the commercials keep waking me up. (vinyllover45@yahoo.com)