Banter provided by Cad and Leis

(Updated 5 Mar 06)

Really Bad Slogans For The New Vitamin-Enhanced Beer

Screw the One-A-Day, go for the Six-A-Day! (

The other "essential vitamins and minerals" that complete the breakfast that your morning cereal doesn't. (stan@squidworkscom)

Official beer of Bode Miller. (

If your friend comes over with a six pack...Vitamin! ( I love a good pun...know any?

Okay, so now the BEER wants to arm wrestle you for money!? (

Makes a great chaser for that new high-fiber vodka! (

Finally, a way to balance liver failure and heart health. ( Endorsed by the AMA/AA?

Who wants a beer gut when you can have beer boobs. (

Sure I could have had a V8, but I'm not a wussy. (

Ouch, my liver hurts! (Oh, sorry - I was just thinking out loud.) ( You better liver alone! (see? I DO love a good pun!!)

It takes a village to raise a healthy field of watered crops. (

Now becoming a drunk is healthy, so B1. (

Combined with the 12-ounce curls, you'll be buff in no time. (

The New Vitamin-Enhanced Beer....You Can't Get A Healthier Buzz. ( Well, you probably can...but not legally.

Drink yourself to better health. (

It's packed full of sudsy riboflavor. (

Keep what little brain cells you have left at their best. (

Wheaties and our beer really IS the "Breakfast of Champions"! ( Finally, definitive proof that breakfast is the most important meal (and hangover) of the day...

"I'm not getting drunk... I'm boosting my immunity!" (

Fortified with Calcium so you're not all hunched over when you play Quarters! (

Now with retinol for improved "beer goggle" vision. ( Well, okay...maybe they didn't think this all the way thru.

From the same people who brought you whole-grain crack... (

"This bod's for you." (

Drink enough of this beer and you'll never notice how good it is for you. (

The winners:

Somewhere there's a Bode Miller joke in here...too bad the Olympics are over and I'm not going to waste good drinking time thinking of one...

Vita-Beer -- Giving you the strength to keep falling down. (

The healthy lifestyle where everyone knows your name...

Vitamin-Enhanced Beer -- Good for what ALES you. (