Banter provided by Cad and Leis
(updated 11 Aug 03)
Really Bad Questions They Left Off the Census
Firstly, yes I'm back from the hospital.... Secondly: Do you know how HARD it is to have your surgeon reverse a sex-change??
Remember that one episode of 'Batman' when Liberace was the villain? [Y/N] (email@example.com)
Okay, we could understand one bathroom entry...but TWO???...
When doing your daily business, do you flush, 1x__2x__3x or more___? (check one) (firstname.lastname@example.org)
On the average, how many times a day do you flush your toilet? If the answer is more than ten, please include a detailed explanation of the problem, as we could all use a good laugh around here. (HerzogVon@aol.com)
Have you seen any of the following people: Elvis, Jimmy Hoffa, Santa Claus. (email@example.com) ...it's like a family reunion!
So Timmy, do you like gladiator movies? (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Love it or leave it. Agree or Disagree (SSCompose@aol.com)
If sex with animals were illegal would you still have the same address? (email@example.com) Note to self: Pay attention to firstname.lastname@example.org's entries from now on...alert PETA.
Number of STD's contracted this year. (email@example.com)
Are you hot? (firstname.lastname@example.org) Mr. Clinton, please go home...
Where were you born; if from any nation ending in "istan" please attached report to the Department of Homeland Security. (email@example.com)
Where were you on the night of October 15, 1998 at or around 4 A.M? (firstname.lastname@example.org) Uh, with your wife...why?
Tastes great or less filling? (MooseSpeak@earthlink.net)
If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be? (email@example.com) So that's what Barbara Walters has been up to.
Do you know where in the constitution the Census is ordered? (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Are you married, or happy? (MooseSpeak@earthlink.net) Happy....VERY happy!
Hey, what's that thing creeping up behind you? Ha! Made you look! Just a little Census humor. (email@example.com)
Do you have any Weapons of Mass Destruction? (FreeLooseDirt@sbcglobal.net) Does stuff in my fridge count?
What are your turn-offs/turn-ons? (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Whew...for a minute there I thought they were going to ask about the basement!...
How many family members, collecting Social Security, are buried in the back yard? (Cantw82paint@Aol.com)
Is that a banjo I hear?
Have you ever 'hit the sheets' with your sister? (Pootybrew@earthlink.net)