Banter provided by Cad and Leis

(Updated 12 Dec 04)

Really Bad Kids' Christmas Shows "The Family Channel" Won't Play

Why Does My Brother Look Like Saint Nick? (

Behind the Red & Green Door ( We know what YOU want for Christmas.

Santa Meets a 747 (

Freddy Krueger's Red Christmas (

Santa and the Naughty Girls ( Now we know where he gets his, um, "jollies".

Something's Been Stuck In The Chimney Since Last Christmas (

Rudolf the Red Assed Baboon. (It may be picked up by Animal Planet, however.) (

Five Golden Rings: The Art of Body Piercing (

Rudolph the Red-Nosed, Rosacea Suffering Reindeer ( Brought to you by the fine people at Financea.

Daddy Drinks During the Holiday Season Because You Want So Damn Many Toys (

Frosty, The Yellow Snowman (

Christmas in Paris . . Hilton (; You knew this was coming.

Santa's Workshop....An intriguing look into his secret workshop and why labor laws don't apply here. (

Michael Moore's version of "Miracle on 34th St.", in which Kris Kringle is exposed as the capitalist tool of Macy's that he really is. ( It's a documentary of course, so it has to be true! ) (

I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Clause. A heart warming story of discovery, love and divorce. ( Daddy was kissing Santa's fine print? EWWWWWWWW

Snoop Dogg's "Krizzle wit' my Nizzles" (

CSI-North Pole. Someone has taken an icicle to Rudolph. Coincidently, venison tacos appear on Santa's breakfast menu. (

Godzilla vs. Santa Claus (

Ted Nugent's "Kill It and Grill It Rockin' Reindeer Christmas Hunt" ( Hey, it's harder than it sounds - they can fly and stuff.

It' a Wonderful Life - So Long as I Get Everything I Asked for Christmas (

Who Wants To Marry My Elf (

Frosty the Puddle!! ( "Oh, there must have been some magic in that ol' blowtorch they found...."

Home Alone With A Wet Toaster (

Ho Ho Ho's and Santa Clizzause's Wild Stocking Stuffer Night ( "Sleigh bell's bling...hey yo' lisnin'?"

"Not-So Little Drummer Boy" starring Tommy Lee & Pamela Anderson (

The Donder Party...When a storm leaves Santa and the Reindeer trapped in the mountains, they must resort to extreme measures to survive. ( Uh...I'll "pass".

The X-Mas Files (

The Year Santa Forgot Your Address ( "Darn, I'm sorry Jimmy, I KNEW we forgot someone when we mailed out those 'Change of Address' cards."

Why Santa is a Myth (

The winners:

I kinda fi-fi-figured...

Santa is Ho-Ho-Horny (

The touching story of someone who really believed it was better to give than to receive...

Welcome To Credit Counseling, Charlie Brown (