Banter provided by Cad and Leis

(updated 12 Jun 03)

Really Bad Ways That Prince William Is Showing Teen Rebellion Against His Dad

Performs a slightly revised impression of Humphrey Bogart.."Ears lookin' at you, Kid!" (

Playing polo in a toga, drinking TWO glasses of wine at supper, and only brushes ONCE a day!! (

He gets caught in a compromising position while sneaking into the tower of London and letting his "commoner girlfriend" play with the "Crown Jewels" ( Wait, did we switch the topic to Charles when I wasn't looking?

Throwing petulant tantrums because he isn't king yet... oh, wait, that's what Charles is doing. (

He asks to borrow the car to see if he can get paparazzi to chase him! (

He starts to use improper English, using words like "Popsy" and "Gnarly". ( But just tack a "bloody" in front of it and you have just made it acceptable.

By claiming the only tea he's ever liked is "Mr.". (

"You probably aren't my real dad" response to most everything. (

Becoming the protagonist on "The Bachelor" in order to choose his wife. (

By threatening to turn 21. ( could happen!

Saying "YEAH BABYYY!!!" at his Grandmother.. (

Waving the other side of his hand. (

At all press conferences, insisting on calling the Palace "F*ckingham" then winking and shooting an index finger at the camera. ( Oooh yes, shame them all by wagging that index finger.

Anonymously had 100 orders of fish and chips delivered to Tony Blair's house. (

The last time they dined at grandma's, he ate his spotted dick with a fish fork. (

Not only refuses to take the old Alfred E. Newman pictures down from his wall, but laughs every time the old man walks by. ( What, me royalty?

Declaring that he wants to be the "queen" of England instead of the king. (

Goes around in public being charming, good-looking and intelligent. Oooh, that really hurts. (

Clashing plaid boxers beneath his kilt! (

Keeps leaving the throne seat up when Camilla is visiting. ( Hey, it is an honest mistake.

Reading the Declaration of Independence at the dinner table (hey, dad, this whole monarchy thing...). (

Making late night escapades with would-be-princesses well known by shouting "The British are coming, the British are coming" from behind his bedroom door. (

The Winners:

I think this goal might be a little too late for him to achieve:

Trying like hell to somehow get in Menudo. (

Charles didn't mind that so much...but drew the line at changing the palace's name to "Your Graceland"...

Prince William dresses up like Elvis saying to his dad, "You may be a prince, but I'm The King." (