Oil bet these responses will be fuel of puns. Only because it is such a Gas. Choose better topics. Diesel be the only way you will stop dipsticks from answering. (Electronicwaffle@yahoo.com)
We used to be crude...now we're refined! (firstname.lastname@example.org; Airfarcewon@aol.com) We have a punny crowd this week....no, I said PUNNY!
Unless You Like To Get Out And Push...You Need Gas To Move Your Tush! (email@example.com)
Regular: $1.99; Medium: Arm; Premium: Leg (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Just bend over and let us "hose" you! (MooseSpeak@netscape.net; email@example.com)
Fill up with $2.39 per gallon 87 octane or higher (limit 10 gallons) and we'll take $1.00 off the $10.00 car wash. Our way of saying thanks during these trying times. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Self-Service! We won't listen to you bitch! (Seeker@vcoms.net) That's right...just talk to the hand...that does the pumping.
3 Days without an Explosion. (email@example.com)
When you hear the name Haliburton, you immediately think of halibut. Small wonder everything about us sounds fishy. (HerzogVon@aol.com)
Exxon - Protecting wildlife since 1993... since 1997... 2001... okay, since Tuesday. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
With gas prices like these, who needs college tuition? (email@example.com)
Act now -- we're raising it to $3 in 2005! (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Be a Classy Lassie...With a Gassy Chassis! (Airfarcewon@aol.com) Now, was that sassy, or a pain in the...
Just stopped by to take a dump? / Well, you don't get the key till you pay our pump! (HerzogVon@aol.com)
Yeah, yeah, but we've got free air. (email@example.com)
What are you going to do? Walk? (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Don't Worry. It Won't Run Out Until Long After We're All Dead. (email@example.com) Hey, I'm not a dinosaur...yet!
Proudly paying our workers less per hour than you're paying dollar per gallon! (firstname.lastname@example.org)
We can afford to drive our SUV's, can you? (email@example.com)
We bring new meaning to "Highway Robbery." (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Fill 'er up...in twelve easy installments! (email@example.com) First installment's an arm....next one's a leg...third one was outlined by Pootybrew...
Now accepting first-born children in exchange for a fill-up. (Pootybrew@goosemoose.com)
We lowered it a dime, so quit yer bitchin'! (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Drive or eat? Eat or drive? You decide. (email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org)
We can fuel all of the people...all of the time. (Airfarcewon@aol.com)
Maintaining high prices so we can maintain high-priced Congressmen. (Pootybrew@goosemoose.com) That's called integrity...and we're full of it.
Iraq-ed up a lot of profit sharing after this year's price increases. (email@example.com)
Our prices will raise your BP! (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Okay, we had a couple of oil spills. Do we really need the entire ecosystem anyway? (email@example.com)
Put a little tiger in your tank (because a lot of tiger will cost too much). (RasGold@cox.net)
No wonder she's always so happy!
We've been pumping Ethyl since 1956! (MooseSpeak@netscape.net)
I wonder who the real clown is...
Why high gas prices boys and girls? Clarabell tell them...'It's Saudi Duty Time'! (firstname.lastname@example.org)