Banter provided by Cad and Leis
(updated 24 Feb 03)
Really Bad New Grammy Award Categories
Best New Artists Who Were In a Group, But Broke Off to Do Solo Projects. Then Realized That They Suck When They Are Alone and Decide to Form Back Into a Group...But With a New Name! (Mistahtom@aol.com)
Best Music to Puke By (firstname.lastname@example.org)
The Phil Spector Award for Creative Editing (email@example.com)
Best Polka-Gangsta Rap Crossover (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Best Mimicked Humility Award (Baitsmotel6@aol.com) I think this one goes hand in hand with Best Song By An Artist Who Just Happens To Be Related To Someone Ultra-famous, But Claims They Did It On Their Own.
Best Song by a Pop Artist Who No Longer Wets the Bed (BikeMike101@aol.com)
"Tonight's nominees for 'Top Male Yodeler' are....." (email@example.com)
Best New Female Artist to Sleep With the Judges (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Best Grammy Show Blooper Award (Baitsmotel6@aol.com) It involves either Ozzy making a speech, or Eminem and Moby having a "chat".
Best Old Crooner Turned Ultra Cool by Cameo Award (email@example.com)
Best New Ruining of a Really Good Song by a Rap Artist With No Taste (firstname.lastname@example.org)
The Milli Vanilli Lifetime Achievement Award (email@example.com) Or half-life award.
Best Confession During a Rap Song That Results In a Conviction (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Best Slut-Dressed Artist (Mistahtom@aol.com) Affectionately now known as the "Christina".
Worst New Artist (Mistahtom@aol.com)
"The nominees for 'Best Song to F%#! To' are..." (email@example.com)
Artist Most Likely to Never be Heard of Again (firstname.lastname@example.org) Norah who?
Album Most Deserving of 8-Track Tape (email@example.com)
To honor the old rockers < LOOK! They Are Still Alive! > Award (MsProzac2003@aol.com) Hey, I always thought you guys said it was better to burn out than fade away?
Best Remake of a Song We All Thought Was Alright the First Time (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Song Most Likely To Become A Karaoke Hit In Japan (email@example.com)
Oh geez, I sense some sampling on Lionel Ritchie's "Lady"...
Best Rap Song to Accidentally Refer to Women In a Respectable Manner (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Finally, an award I can look forward to:
Most Pretentious (nominees include Bono and Sting) (email@example.com)