Really Bad New Slogans For The Newly Merged Kmart/Sears Store
Now we're big enough to sell junk and take advantage of everybody like Walmart does! (Pootybrew@goosemoose.com)
The crap's all inside. (DaJakAiss@aol.com)
Two dumb stores blended into one big dumb store. (Airfarcewon@aol.com) Spend your dullards...uh, DOLLARS...here!
Where Americans adversely effected by punitive Presidential tax cuts for the fabulously wealthy shop. (email@example.com)
Shop SMART! ... Shop S-Mart! (RasGold@cox.net)
KMart and Sears: If Walmart keeps putting us out of business one store at a time we'll last twice as long this way. (Pootybrew@goosemoose.com) Now that's a/an (I'm soooo confused) S-Mart idea! Uh...whatever...just see RasGold's entry.
More aging models and domestic diva spokespeople for your dollar! (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Same Cheap Crap but with New Higher Prices!!! (email@example.com; firstname.lastname@example.org)
We've joined forces because two lackluster franchises are better than one! (email@example.com)
K-Mart and Sears have gotten together, like Martha and her cell mate. (Cantw82paint@aol.com)
It's probably not as bad as you think! (ListenBucko@yahoo.com) Yes, it is.
If we can't make it together, you can kiss your local economy good bye! (HerzogVon@aol.com)
All a redneck could ever need under one roof. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
The new home of Martha Stewart Power Tools (email@example.com) ...featuring the all-new "Martha Stewart Cake-with-file-inside".
Sears. KMart. Big losses. Any questions? (Pootybrew@goosemoose.com)
We have a blue light special on worthless stock! (ListenBucko@yahoo.com)
K-Sears: Keeping Walmart & Target laughing. (Skibip@aol.com)
Crappy merchandise, poorly displayed. Now twice as many locations. (Skibip@aol.com) Wow, when you put it that way...it almost seems inviting.
Sears/Kmart - No one ever went bankrupt underestimating the American consumer. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
We took the "S" from Sears and the "MART" from KMart and we came up with Kears! (email@example.com) (with apologies to all the Bruce Campbell fans, heh heh)
It's all inside....well, except for Jaclyn Smith, she won't come in. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Conveniently located on the way to your Walmart! (ListenBucko@yahoo.com)
Come see the cheaper side of Sears. (email@example.com) Hmmmm...is this possible??
Our Craftsman tools are guaranteed forever... or at least as long as we can keep afloat. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Sears-Mart: Not cheaper prices; just cheaper. (email@example.com)
Ewe arrr ay jeanie...um a genie....a geenyus....you's smart!...
We put the 'K' in "kuality"! (firstname.lastname@example.org)
You know, this is so incredibly wittily stupid...it just might work...
Featuring blue light specials in a catalog near you! (email@example.com)