Banter provided by Cad and Leis

(updated 6 Feb 03)

Really Bad Times to Break Up With Your Significant Other

While he's proposing on bended knee. (chefrandy@charter.net)

During a Full Moon..If her razor and toothbrush have been working harder. (Baitsmotel6@aol.com) Wow, a leftover from "ReBa Signs You're Dating a Werewolf"!

"Oh, honey... I'm so sorry to hear your entire family died in a bus accident... You need someone to be there for you. By the way, we need to talk..." (y2patton@yahoo.com)

Valentine's Day. Trust me on this one. (junkmailmagnet42@aol.com)

When she's peeling potatoes. Getting peeled to death is NOT the way I want to go. (strollo5@aol.com) Yeah yeah..."ouch, I hate it when that happens".

The day she gets out of prison for that mass murder of her past lovers. (rickstomb@hotmail.com)

During some particularly good sex. (kamasushi@aol.com)

Right after they have been hit by a car, buried under ground, dug back up, and brought back to life. That's really a bit traumatic. (Gonnabmeeee@aol.com) I love it when the mad scientists contribute to the ReBa!

During a little "Presidential" treatment. (DrownedRat@hotmail.com)

The day before she turns 18 and inherits 2.7 billion dollars. (SpinyNorma@aol.com)

Honey, I'm really sorry about your parents' divorce. I'd like to stay and talk, but I'm late for my date with your Mom. (craigieb@aol.com)

After discovering that all the others that tried to leave... are buried in the basement. (Cantw82paint@aol.com) No, "AFTER" would just be plain stupidity on your part.

The day before the reading of her rich uncle's will. (kirstennetsrik@yahoo.com)

About 6 seconds after they have learned they are being fired from the Post Office.. (gregparsons68@yahoo.com)

In the middle of a phone conversation, right after they have told you they just lost their job, and their dog just got ran over. (lacee7700@aol.com) ...I usually call that "a typical Monday".

Before she has cleaned the toilet, washed the clothes, cooked dinner and washed the dishes. (kaycorbett@hotmail.com)

When she's at seven centimeters. (mimsydivine@earthlink.net) Like 10 would be more appropriate?

While she's wrapping your parachute. (deezzine@aol.com)

Just before her "wild" second cousin visits. (seeker@vcoms.net)

The winners...sorta...

Wow, this one's like "The Fugitive" meets "Blind Date":

Just before you find out he's being paroled. (mrsbrak@aol.com)

Well, chances are YOU woulda been history right after anyway...

Right before she wins the Powerball lottery. (Baitsmotel6@aol.com;YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)