Banter provided by Cad and Leis

(updated 6 Sep 03)

Well, it seems Leis is AWOL again, so until he shows back up I shall go it alone.

Really Bad Excuses Given By The 18-Year-Old Computer Virus 'Worm Maker'

I needed to put something impressive on my college applications. So... are you impressed? (

Well, Hack3681 double-dog dared me. (;

Did it to impress Jody Foster. (

I just purchased a computer fishing game and I needed bait. (

It was either that or go outdoors and catch the West Nile Virus. ( Yeah, can't have you even taking any chances and going outside, can we?

Hoping to get sent to jail so I can get Kobe Bryant's autograph. (

My girlfriend made the iloveyou virus and I wanted to feel adequate. (

Well, it all started as a science project about a worm farm, yeah that's it, and then it kinda sorta got outta control... (

I thought that SoBig was a penis enhancer, man, really... (

All those fattening Chicken McNuggets clouded my judgement. ( Sounds like a million dollar deal to me.

Sometimes the cat gets on the keyboard. (;

After seeing 'The Matrix,' I decided to devote my life to sabotaging computers every chance I get! I mean, we don't want them taking over the planet, do we?" (

But I just got so tired of downloading porn... (

Well, according to and, that's what got you into trouble in the first place...

I thought if I forwarded it to 15 million people a little kitten would walk across the screen! (