NipGun: The high-powered home nipple piercing machine. (email@example.com)
Craftsman Combination Concrete and Cake Mixer (firstname.lastname@example.org) Hmmmm...in my house, how could you tell the difference?
The all-in-one handy dandy nose-hair trimmer, toenail clipper, and toothpick. (email@example.com)
Laser-Powered Wood Saw (firstname.lastname@example.org)
The Reversible Stud or Chick Finder (email@example.com) Oh, good! I happen to be a reversible stud!
A hollow-handled hammer to store the first aid cream and Band-Aids. (DADEOH44@aol.com)
For Christmas I want: Miss Crafty: Blow-up Workshop Assistant and 'Tool Holder'! (AhOLHOL@aol.com)
Home Dentistry Kit - Complete with Pliers and High-Speed Drill (firstname.lastname@example.org) Sure to put a smile on every customer's face...
The Pocket Chainsaw. (email@example.com)
The "Hands Free" Circular Saw (StanYan1@aol.com)
Trepanner, with lifetime warranty (yours, not the tool's). (firstname.lastname@example.org) Oh, yeah...I need this tool like I need another hole in my head.
"Nut Buster" Wrench (email@example.com)
The Craftsman Wood Chipper and Neighbor Shredder (Pootybrew@earthlink.net)
Slotted Screwdriver...that "doubles" as a butter knife. (Cantw82paint@Aol.com)
The Leaf/Flame Blower (firstname.lastname@example.org) Isn't this endorsed by Tim Allen?
Craftsman's book series, "How to Make a Bong Out of Anything". (email@example.com)
Craftsman Adjustable Belt Sander With Turquoise Buckle (firstname.lastname@example.org)
The Blazin' Laser Gas Line Cutter (email@example.com) ....Possibly the last tool you will EVER need.
Unskillz saw. (VxAnthraX@aol.com)
Craftswoman® Idiot-proof Tools. (Maybe I too should change my e-mail address.) (VxAnthraX@aol.com)
A "Money-you-would-have-saved-if-only-you'd-listened-to-your-wife-and-hired-a-professional" Counter. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Self-surgery kit, sold under the brand name "Suture Self." (email@example.com)
Warning: Do not attempt to use saw while trying to get into the Liquid "Guinness" Book of Records...
Irish Jigsaw (firstname.lastname@example.org)
MORE ReBa Ways To dispose Of A Dead Horse...
The Craftsman One-Horse Glue Mixer/Dispenser (email@example.com)