(updated 5 Mar 05)

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President George W. Bush: Teaching Grammar School English
(Topic Suggested By Cantw82paint@Aol.com)

At the end of the year, they left HIM behind. (DaphnetheRed@yahoo.com)

Serious inquiries were made into his teaching skills, because all his students developed vaugly autistic obsessions with the words "freedom" and "liberty". (bobshush2@yahoo.com)

"Lookee, you wanna learn how to spell, go ask Dan Quayle!" (ListenBucko@yahoo.com)

Writes On Blackboard: "George Bush kicked John Kerry's butt on election day." Now, who can underline the subject, the verb, and the LOOOOOSER!! in this sentence. (astae@paonline.com) My Respect For The American Democratic System

"Never misunderestimate the importance of vowels or Poland. Heh." (AutumnEagl@yahoo.com) Hey, don't forget Afghanistan's contribution: American Soldiers.

"Examine this sentence: 'War with Iraq is necessary.' Notice how it is missing any direct object." (giraffic_art@yahoo.com)

I want to start by saying that I do know there is no "E" at the end of potata. There's an "A". (jajuta@comcast.net)

"Now, class, homonyms sound the same, but should not be allowed to marry." (giraffic_art@yahoo.com) We must preserve the Sancticty of our Sentances.

"The best way to avoid dangling participles, lil' Billy? Keep your fly zipped. Next question..." (HerzogVon@aol.com)

"Ok, kids...time to break for recession!" (cmndrnineveh@aol.com)

"Hi students, there will BE NO child left behind here...if you lads get behind or show me your behind, I will personally see to it you spend at least ONE year in Iraq as a coalition drummer boy!" (humorbear@aol.com)

Micheal Moore: This is a national disgrace! The President is reading "My Pet Goat" to elementry school students when he could be trying to fix Social... uh... never mind. (dart270@geocities.com) There, now you can't say my competition has a liberal bias. :)


"You've heard Al Gore say he invented the internet. Well, if he was so smart, why do all the addresses begin with "W"?" (DOrr@jam.rr.com)