(1 May 06)

The winner: fparsons@yahoo.com...who will receive a signed cartoon rendering of their entry:

Stu's

fparsons

Voting Results:
Stu: 29%
fparsons: 71%

The Runners-Up:

a: "Practicing to be a lawyer?" b: "Yep. There's just no hiding it is there?" (tpanner@hotmail.com)

"That's funny. My girlfriend doesn't seem to care that Geppetto made me without a penis." (Pootybrew@goosemoose.com)

"You've got a gift for running a puppet government. It's as plain as the nose on your face!" (AuntShecky711@aol.com)

"No, you bend over and pick up that toy." "No, you bend over and pick it up." (Cantw82paint@Aol.com)

Viagra, the cocaine of a new generation..... (imwednesdayaddams@yahoo.com)

"You've just got to find a nice girl who wants you to keep telling her lies." (lexkase@san.rr.com)

"All I know is I said 'I'll respect you in the morning', and the next thing.....this!" (skibip@aol.com)

I knew a sequel was coming eventually. (phil82@aol.com)

Pinocchio at left with bubble: "Yeah, I did it 'til I started going blind. What REALLY killed me were the splinters." (strontium901@juno.com)

"You know Bob, I'm tired of your jokes about my hat. I'm only wearing it to take attention off of your ridiculous toupee!" (Kamasushi@gmail.com)

"Some days it just sucks having morning wood." (e-marlon@sio.midco.net)

A. "What could be worse than all those kids at school always teasing us?" B. "What they'll do to us in wood shop!" (maxcel200@aol.com)

A: "Sorry, Pinocchio, Geppetto said he likes me best!" B: "Yeah, for firewood!" (JTulli@Juno.com)

"I'm so ugly that I have to sit here and pine, but YOU! One look into your hazel eyes, and some willowy blonde's gonna sweep you off your feet!" (paracletus3@earthlink.net)

Wooden boy: "And that's why I no longer vote Republican." (moonwolfnsc@aol.com)

a: "Remember, if Geppetto asks who squished Jiminy with a brick, tell 'em I did it. Say it exactly like that -- 'I did it'." Caption: "Pinocchio and his lesser known, stupider brother, Scapegoatio." (tpanner@hotmail.com)