(10 Aug 04)

The winner: maxcel200@aol.com...who will receive a signed cartoon rendering of their entry:

Stu's Original


Voting Results:
Stu: 34%
maxcel200: 66%

The Runners-Up:

"At last, Earth! We can finally escape the stupidity of our Electoral College and Two-party System!" (monetmonet@artlover.com)

"Note that planet son. 'Tis a very strange place. For some reason, they believe their men are from Mars and their women are from Venus." (pjb1671@netscape.net)

"If I have to hear about your Cousin Yoda and the Jedi movement one more time..." (allen018@aol.com)

Intergalactic rock superstars Green Floyd get the inspiration for their classic "Dark Side of the Earth" LP. (joseph.blevins@verizon.net)

"No, we went there last year. Absolutely no signs of intelligent life." (mrxsandmanx@yahoo.com)

"They only have one thing that can go faster than us...it's called a taxicab." (maxcel200@aol.com)

"I don't know if we should do this...did you see 'Independence Day'?" (super_hunk_funk_monk@hotmail.com)

"We'd have been there 700 years ago if you'd stopped to ask directions!" (TheWhineCritic@aol.com)

"When we land, stop at Hollywood Blvd and Vine...we'll fit right in!" (maxcel200@aol.com)

"Hmmm...interesting species...But what is this thing they keep saying...'Dickface?'" (MrsMikeyDee@aol.com)

"Next time, don't download a map from the Internet!" (junkmailmagnet42@aol.com)

"Would you please slow down!! Who do you think you are, George Jetson?!!" (allen018@aol.com)

"OK, son, you wanted a pet, pick one!" (phil@aol.com)

"Because broads have tiny little bladders, Mikey. That's why your mom and your sister get to stop on Earth." (khalazdad@adelphia.net)

"Too green...in about 8000 years it'll be ripe." (deweyever@attbi.com)

"There's a beautiful Earth out there tonite, Baby...so how's about a kiss?" (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

(caption) "I've told those kids a thousand times: Keep the #%&@#! beachballs out of the driveway!" (AuntShecky711@aol.com)

Zweborb and Twobop have a 10 year lead, but surprise awaits them in this installment of "The Amazing Race Around the Universe." (william.fishburne@verizon.net)

"Do you think they will pay attention to the eviction notice?" (phil@aol.com)

Alien with mouth open: "Earth? Piece 'o' cake! We sent Oxnard, the one eyed, purple guy with the horns there 48 of their years ago, and they made him into a celebrity! We should be able to overthrow their government in no time!" (cmndrnineveh@aol.com)

"Forget about moving there, G'Xaar. I hear Earthlings VOLUNTARILY inject toxins into their faces and remove the hair from their bodies with hot wax!" (joseph.blevins@verizon.net)

"These drive-thru lines are ridiculous!" (moonbunch01@aol.com)

"Every time we go out for a little drive, they try to shoot us down..." (GerriHan65@aol.com)

"$2.35 9/10... too expensive to re-fuel here. Lets move on!" (maxcel200@aol.com)

Caption: "I TOLD York that wasn't going to be enough chocolate sauce..." (wild_wonderful_westvirginian@charter.net)