(27 Jan 03)

The winner: avit.web@verizon.net...who will receive a signed cartoon rendering of their entry:

Stu's Original


Voting Results:
Stu: 50%
avit.web: 50%

The Runners-Up:

Somehow, I think Capital Punishment just wouldn't be effective in this case. (moonbunch01@aol.com)

Remember, you're underdressed -- er, under oath. (junkmailmagnet42@aol.com)

I told you to present a "bonded" expert, not a "bondage" expert. (rsherman@netplexgroup.com)

Counsel's request to question the witness in my chambers is DENIED! (strollo5@aol.com)

Look, with the recent budget cuts, she's the closest thing to a bailiff we can afford. (mr_didgers@hotmail.com)

No you cannot enter her breasts as exhibit "Double-D". (jnmcda0@yahoo.com)

Please inform your client that taking the fifth does not refer to a Kama Sutra position. (mykehalpinstudio@aol.com)

I don't see anything 'cruel or unusual' about her punishment; she charges $200 an hour for it. (MooseSpeak@earthlink.net)

Mr. Lawyer, I said call your witness not mistress! (boogiewithbri@aol.com)

Yes Counselor, I am sure choosing an all male jury has greatly helped your clients chances. (bongobill0767@aol.com)

No, the witness will not be the judge of weather or not we have a "hung" jury (deezzine@aol.com)

Look Counselor, I don't care if she IS Sharon Stone, you cannot "debrief" her from here. (guitartexn@aol.com)

A Dominosnatrix is supposed to deliver in twenty minutes or less: Case dismissed! (HerzogVon@aol.com)

Counselor, just because you paid $9 to see "Swept Away" is no reason to put Madonna on the stand. (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)

Mr. Jenkins, please stop asking her how much a spanking would cost and ask some actual case questions. (jrgracey1@aol.com)

Judge: "Is this witness of any relevance,counsel?" Lawyer: "No,Your Honor, I just like looking at her" (Kayvotr@aol.com)