(8 Mar 04)

The winner: monetmonet@artlover.com...who will receive a signed cartoon rendering of their entry:

Stu's Original


Voting Results:
Stu: 20%
monetmonet: 80%

The Runners-Up:

"It seemed the safest place for Ralph Nader when he said he thought he could win." (khalazdad@adelphia.net)

"He said he suddenly realized that we were going to have to elect ONE of them." (chharget@aol.com)

"To reward Murphy's legendary ass-kissing, the board had his office painted with a mural of each of their butt holes." (monetmonet@artlover.com)

"He's a sad case...a long term Chicago Cubs fan...." (cmndrnineveh@aol.com)

"He's got eight kids and his wife is a bitch, he just comes here to unwind." (Cantw82paint@Aol.com)

"From Howard Dean's speechwriter to this!" (robertellingsworth@yahoo.com)

"Jeez...the first time I decide to shag my secretary and we have a damn patient in the padded cell!" (sheafitz1@netscape.com)

"Dammit, Mathilda, for the last time, go and change out of that Star Trek costume. These people are already delusional." (khalazdad@adelphia.net)

"He pled guilty. Nobody ever does that. He must be crazy." (william.fishburne@verizon.net)

"You can only be mistaken for Carrot Top so many times before you start throwing lead...." (redbarron1010@aol.com)

"We need to get someone in there to scratch his balls." (lsamarri@aol.com)

"No home, no responsibilities, no relationships, not even TV... God, how I envy him." (MooseSpeak@netscape.net)

"It all started when he tried to assemble an entertainment center." (mykehalpinstudio@aol.com)

"Cheer up, Ethel. They say you're almost done with your stint in the arachnophobia unit." (kayladykay@aol.com)

"Do you think we went a little too far with his punishment? He only cut school." (moonbunch01@aol.com)

"Who has the advantage now, Mr. Bond?" (robertellingsworth@yahoo.com)

"He was a cartoonist. He kept pitting his wit against the entire Internet community and finally he just...snapped..." (zenphoenix@yahoo.com)

"I told you we should have hid those home movies of ours better." (nallumderaj@aol.com)

"Take a good look, dear...that's my first wife, so mind your P's and Q's." (NITRTAMXXX@AOL.COM)

"Yes, he does look calm and serene in there. It's amazing what a little care, love and huge horse tranquilizers can do to help people." (kamasushi@aol.com)