(updated 3 Jul 05)  

Top Ten Proposed CBS Evening News 'Sign Offs' for Katie Couric

"This is Katie Couric for the CBS Evening News. Where the fuck's my post-show doughnut?!" (tpanner@hotmail.com) Not so much a signing-off as typical morning show diva-mentia...oh, you know she does this. Now on to the list...

10. I'm Queen of the World!!! (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)

9. Remember, when you see me, you C-BS! (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

8. I'm Katie Couric. And this is the cutest news you can get. (rte.99@netzero.com)

7. AAAND that's the evening news I'm Katie Couric and I make more money a year than you'll make in a lifetime. (dorr@jam.rr.com)

6. Stay perky, planet Earth. (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)

5. Up yours Matt; bite me Al; and to Anne back in the studio...suck it! (IR2Odie@aol.com)

4. No more leg! Get over it America. (tpanner@hotmail.com)

3. Good night and have a pleasant colonoscopy. (CoyPsyche@aol.com; tpanner@hotmail.com)

2. Bringing home the bacon, frying it up in the pan, I'm Katie Couric replacing the man! (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)

Of all the colonoscopy entries...uh um...maybe a poor choice of words there...anyway...this was one of the cleanest...oh, I give up...this is just too easy...

1. Hope your night is super; remember to clean out your pooper! (tpep19@aol.com)