(updated 6 Nov 06)  

Top Ten Proposed Self-Written Wedding Vows For Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes

10. "I will love, honor and cherish you and I promise never to use L. Ron Hubbard's name in vain." (Jdoveraz@aol.com)

9. "I, Katie, promise to always wear flats and to smile until my face breaks." (JoyfulDJoy@aol.com)

8. "I vow that I will not lose the next movie company that I establish." (vinyllover45@yahoo.com)

7. "Once again, Tom, you did remember to sign the prenup, right?" (tpanner@hotmail.com)

6. "I will never tell anyone that his best man is his BEST man." (Steveandmoki@yahoo.com)

5. For Katie: "I promise to love, honor, and obey your every command, Master." Come on, he has her under hypnosis, check the eyes. (strontium901@juno.com; leissuit@msn.com)

4. "We will grow old together, but never look like it since we will have the best plastic surgeons at our disposal." (ldolphin34@hotmail.com)

3. "We, Tom and Katie, promise to keep mystifying the media while we help our alien friends in their plan for world domination." (ltldollclaudia@yahoo.com)

2. "I, Katie, will now answer to the more grown-up sounding name "Kate" since you need me to appear a little older so it won't seem so sick that you're my dad's age." (YeIIowRoseOTX@aol.com)

Hey...yet another opportunity to make an apology to get more publicity...

1. "...in sickness and in health, except if you get a chemical imbalance because we all know that crap is made up." (flynnkj19@aol.com)