(updated 10 Sep 03)  

Top Ten Ways "Animal House" Would Be Different If They Filmed It Today

10. Five of the frat guys would have "fabulous" taste and do makeovers on the others. (chharget@aol.com)

9. PETA would protest the title. (archerjoe@hotmail.com)

8. There would be product placement every few seconds, so instead of advising Flounder to "start drinking heavily," Bluto would say, "I advise you to drink smooth, refreshing Coors Light ... responsibly." (joseph.blevins@verizon.net)

7. Old and Busted: Toga Party; New Hotness: Rave! (rsherman@netplexgroup.com)

6. Bluto could still have sex naked, but he'd have to wear a condom. (junkmailmagnet42@aol.com)

5. The underage party girl would have more piercings. (chharget@aol.com)

4. The Deltas would be on Double Ashcroft probation. (hmo@colegrovia.com)

3. The "Eat Me" float would be labeled with its carb content. (jaynashvil@aol.com)

2. Famous exploding zit scene now enhanced with CGI technology. (grumpchong@aol.com)

Even tho it would be more realistic...I don't think I could stomach it...or another sequel...

1. John Belushi would have to be moved around like the guy from "Weekend at Bernie's". (philden82@aol.com)