(updated 10 Sep 05)  

Top Ten Downsides To Having Martha Stewart's Ankle Bracelet Removed
(Topic Inspired by Cantw82paint@Aol.com)

10. It was great fun to see the thing beep like crazy whenever she would exit a Kmart. (tpanner@inorbit.com)

9. She'll probably model a new kind of napkin ring after it. (cmndrnineveh@aol.com; MrglsJon@aol.com)

8. Oh, great!! Now she's free to stalk me again!! (Jdoveraz@aol.com)

7. The bracelet doubled as a pacemaker, so without it she will return to the heartless bitch that she is. (tpep19@aol.com)

6. Has to now change her carpet and drapes scheme. (Mistahtom@aol.com)

5. I had September 9 in the "Martha Stewart Ankle Bracelet Removal Date" pool. (DLivermore2002@yahoo.com)

4. Unknown built in listening device won't be able to pick up good stock tips or cooking recipes anymore. (dorr@jam.rr.com)

3. Have you ever smelled it when someone gets a cast off? Imagine that on 60 year old flesh. Ugh. (old.curmudgeon@hmoforum.com)

2. The tattoo of her prison girlfriend's name is revealed. (tpanner@inorbit.com)

Guess it's back to getting lackey #3 to do it for her...

1. No longer able to shake her leg and change TV channels when misplacing the remote. (Airfarcewon@aol.com)