(updated 25 Jul 04)  

Top Ten Chapter Titles In Martha Stewart's Upcoming "Stock Trial" Book

10. Martyr Stewart (Airfarcewon@aol.com)

9. Inside A Correctional Facility, Cigarettes Are Actually Healthy (junkmailmagnet42@aol.com)

8. How to Festoon a Jury Box With Common, Garden Variety Poisonous Plants (HerzogVon@aol.com)

7. Chapter Two: Honestly, I Thought I Was Dealing in Beef and Chicken Stock, NOT Bull and Bear Stock! (robtone247@yahoo.com)

6. How to Hide Your "Inner Bitch" From the Jury (Cantw82paint@Aol.com)

5. How I Accumulated Enough Money to Live in a 'Gated' Community! (maxcel200@aol.com)

4. Chapter I: I Get Five Months While O.J. Gets to Play Golf (davidgotribe@aol.com)

3. How I Publicly Compared My Plight to Nelson Mandela's Without Laughing Hysterically (lexkase@san.rr.com)

2. Offering to Accessorize the Judge's Living Room: Apparently Not As Effective As Sex (skibip@aol.com)

All together now..."This woulda been a good thing"...

1. Chapter "Eleven": My Daddy Always Told Me to Avoid the Stock Market, and Now I'm "ImCloned" to Agree (AuntShecky711@aol.com)