(updated 2 May 04)  

Top Ten Comedian Pick-up Lines

10. I once killed a woman in bed. Yeah, that's right, she died laughing. (william.fishburne@verizon.net)

9. If I called you a booby, would you hold it against me? (cmndrnineveh@aol.com)

8. So, this comedian walks up to a beautiful girl in a bar... (archerjoe@hotmail.com)

7. My jokes suck...do you? (flynnkj19@aol.com)

6. I tickled your funny bone, now it's your turn to tickle mine. (LastComicStandng@aol.com)

5. If you think my stand-up routine is good, you should see how I perform laying down. (stoneguy@bellsouth.net)

4. Once you've had a comedian, you'll never go back to morticians again. (chharget@aol.com)

3. I'm trying to write a monologue on tanning. Could you show me some good lines? (ldolphin34@hotmail.com)

2. Take my number. Please! (dinosaur1972@aol.com)

Sooo...to make a long story short...

1. A funny thing happened to me on the way here from the penile enlargement clinic... (chharget@aol.com)