(updated 3 May 05)  

Top Ten Important Things I Learned In My Lifetime That I Think Have Made Me More Tolerant
(Topic suggested by NITRAMXXX@AOL.COM)

10. It's impossible to kill EVERY person who pisses me off, I have to be selective. (DLivermore2002@yahoo.com)

9. Madonna will not go away. (cmndrnineveh@aol.com)

8. Tolerance means acting in accordance with Jerry Springer's final thought, not acting like the guests on his show. (jnmcda0@yahoo.com)

7. Good drugs always trump a bad attitude. (DLivermore2002@yahoo.com)

6. You WILL BE your mother some day... (guys, this is not for you, you will MARRY someone like your mother). (agapeagent@yahoo.com)

5. I've argued with 6 cops and been arrested 6 times. 'Nuf said. (Eleman8859@aol.com)

4. I'm smarter than the President of the United States. (amfpsych@aol.com)

3. To never tell my problems...'cause half the people you tell don't care and the other half are glad to hear. (rem7202@msn.com)

2. Common sense ain't so common. (w.kaer@att.net)

Hey, give me some credit...it's getting harder and harder to find ailments that have "late updates" as a symptom...

1. I've learned to actually admire the fortitude of hypochondriacs...strangely, they never get sick of being that way. (maxcel200@aol.com)