Tweak Of The Week LXXIV: Campaign Wishes...and Caviar Dreams
(Updated 6 Aug 03)

Last week we asked you to come up with campaign slogans for a celebrity...living or dead...for some reason we received a copious amount of entries for J Lo and Monica Lewinsky...and not one for Anna Nicole Smith...about time someone forgets about her.

Imelda Marcos: She's a Shoe-In (dakotadave57104@yahoo.com)

Tonya Harding: Give her a break! (murdoctor@aol.com)

Cheech and Chong: Would be smokin' hot candidates..and Weed all vote for them. (Baitsmotel6@aol.com)

Jerry Springer: The best candidate for the party represented by the ass! (jnmcda0@yahoo.com)

Ronald Reagan: I was President already? (watch4whales@yahoo.com)

100 people surveyed, top five answers say: Richard Dawson for Governor! (trekmeister@conwaycorp.net)

MTV's Kennedy: No relation! (junkmailmagnet42@aol.com)

Dan Quayle for Prezi...press...presido...you know, the guy who runs the country. (trekmeister@conwaycorp.net)

Monica Lewinsky for President: Put me back in the White House and this time I won't blow it. (razcactus@netzero.com)

Verne Troyer for President: He's for the little guy. (MrglsJon@aol.com)

Colin Farrell for President: Sorry fellas... women make up 53% of the demographic. (NegaDoug@hotmail.com)

Jennifer Lopez: Has a big following. (Baitsmotel6@aol.com)

Mike Tyson: Won't talk your ear off with campaign promises. (ethnargy@bergoo.com)

Arnold Schwarzenegger: Even though you can't understand him, he understands you. (SSCompose@aol.com)

Pete Sampras: He'll serve his country well. (murdoctor@aol.com)

George Bush Sr.: You know I'm a lot better than that idiot kid of mine. (Pootybrew@earthlink.net)

Joe Cocker for President, with Mike Tyson as VP: Give him your ear, and I'll sing you a song. (suepermart@aol.com)

The runner-up...who wins an origami creation...

Michael Douglas: You remember him in "The American President"...looked like he did a nice job. (dinosaur1972@aol.com)

The winner of that set of mousetraps...

Pete Rose: Bet you can't find a better man for the job. (tygrkhat40@yahoo.com)



Well, we searched all over the house for a prize that was both odd and functional...and we came up with one that pretty much met those two elements. It's a Safety 1st Bath Toy Bag...measuring about a foot or so square. It's mesh and is supposed to be used to hang on your bathtub or wall (hence the suction cups) to dry your wet bath toys. But I really think you could use your imagination and use it to hang your sponges in the kitchen...I bet you could even put onions or potatoes in it - but I wouldn't count on it supporting too much weight unless you used a hook or nail. I really don't believe we ever used it, or if we did, we possibly did just once, as I honestly can't remember it ever hanging up in a place of prominence in our bathroom. Regardless, it is machine washable and can be yours, if you win this week's Tweak.


Oxymoronic Products

This week's Tweak idea was sent in by MistahTom@aol.com...and, as usual, for doing so, he wins an origami creation of his choice. What he suggested was to come up with products that just could never be...or at least would be very stupid marketing ideas if they did. We know this one takes a little bit more thinking, so that's why we are using it this time around, since the Tweak will run a little longer than a week this time out...but there is no "second part", so you also get a bit of a reprieve. Still confused? Check out our examples below...the first two are from MistahTom, the third is from my son.

Examples:

DVD Rewinder

Solar-powered Flashlight

Teflon's Non-stick Flypaper


Due to the late update this time around, the next TOTW will be Sunday 17 Aug 03.