Tweak Of The Week LXXXI: Scary Movie With A Twist
(Updated 30 Oct 03)
Last time around we asked you to combine two (or more) movies/TV shows together as in our examples...with the catch that one of them had to be scary. We had a lot of really great entries this time around...unfortunately many were scrapped because they weren't exactly scary/horror-type movies or because the movies didn't "merge" into each other the way they were supposed to. I think we shall have to bring this one back in the near future and not have the genre stipulation...so feel free to hang on to/resend your entry next time if it didn't make it this time around.
Twelve Angry Monkeys: A remake of the old original Evolution trial, where chosen jurists go bananas...and the jury's still out on this one. (Baitsmotel6@aol.com)
Saturday Night of the Living Dead Fever: Flesh-crazed zombies don polyester suits and eat to the disco beat! (MrglsJon@aol.com)
The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas Chainsaw Massacre: Gentlemen who go to the Chicken Ranch and say "eat me" may get more than they bargained for. (email@example.com)
The King Kong and I: a sexy blonde finds true love with a gorilla in imperial Thailand. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Animal House on Haunted Hill: Belushi rises from the dead and spits cottage cheese on unsuspecting house guests. (MrglsJon@aol.com)
Three Men and a Little Rosemary's Baby: Three men raise the antichrist, and with Ted Danson as one of the fathers, it would bring out the devil in anyone. (PromiseNotKept@aol.com)
Night of the Living Dead Poets Society: A professor tries to get a group of Zombies to read poetry. All they can say is "uuuggghhhh." (email@example.com)
Nightmare on Sesame Street: Freddy is at it again scaring the stuffing out of our little friends. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Sleepy Hollow Man: Who needs Freddy vs. Jason? In this saga, we have the headless horseman versus invisible Kevin Bacon super hero. Who will win? (PromiseNotKept@aol.com)
Shallow Hal-loween: In this one, Gwyneth Paltrow's character looks like a hottie, but actually weighs 300 lbs. She's done in by Michael, who develops a hernia while trying to dispose of the body. (Baitsmotel6@aol.com)
Nightmare on Elm Street 3 Stooges Meet Frankenstein: Freddy Kruger keeps getting poked in the eye by Moe as Larry and Curly try to use his hands to carve up the monster. (Pootybrew@earthlink.net)
Freaky Friday the 13th: A body-switch comedy involving the machete-wielding Jason Voorhees, whose personality winds up inside the body of a teenage girl (and vice versa). (email@example.com)
Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolfman?: An alcoholic couple battles lycanthropy on a night of indecent pleasures. (RasGold@aol.com)
Silence of Lamb Chop's Play-Along: A cannibalistic sock puppet is asked to help unravel a murder mystery. (firstname.lastname@example.org)
The Princess Bride of Frankenstein: Peter Falk narrates the story of Princess Buttercup falling in love with a reanimated monster. The fight scene with Andre the Giant will go down in history as the most mumbling ever captured on screen. (email@example.com)
CreepShowGirls: A Series of Vignettes that feature flesh eating strippers (KatBug78@netzero.net)
Sixth Sense and Sensibility: "I see dead stuffy Victorian people." (MedCheryl@aol.com)
Our runner-up who wins an origami creation of their choice from our list...
Father of the Bride of Frankenstein. Before the wedding, a nervous bride confides in her dad that she has cold feet. He then explains to her that she has cold feet because they were sewn on and no longer have proper blood flow." (rodentsRred@hotmail.com)
The winner of that scary miniature Mardi Gras-type doll...
Rosemary's Baby Geniuses: As if one wasn't enough, Rosemary has quintuplets. Rosemary's worst nightmare is realized when all five of her little devils are accepted to MIT, and she has to battle the evil forces of an economic recession to raise the tuition for her demonic progeny. (Polaris75@aol.com)
The prize this time around is quite brand new...in fact we just won it at the Zoo Boo they have here in town. I must say Montgomery does put on an excellent Zoo Boo and they really outdid themselves this year. Okay, now back to the prize...it is a 14-inch pink segmented/jointed plastic snake, with these yellow, red and black "scale design" stickers on it . It's probably worth a whole 15 cents...and will actually cost me more to mail than what it is worth. But...it's free to you and you can only win this one here...if you win the Tweak this week.
Drug Score Jingle
Well, I had a hard time coming up with a Tweak this time around that didn't contain celebrities...but I think I did it. We all pretty much probably remember the Alka-Seltzer "Plop plop fizz fizz...oh what a relief it is" ditty, so I thought why can't other medicines get the same rhyming treatment. So, what we want you to do this time around is to take any medication, prescription or over the counter, and come up with a crude, funny, off-the-wall ditty to go with it. I came up with a pretty crude one myself below...basically so I wouldn't have to turn down 20 of the same type...when you read it, you will probably understand what I mean.
RU-486 Abortion Pill: Take our pill it works much faster...on your little unplanned disaster.